The Lost Boy

Counsellor: “A little boy comes to you crying and upset, what do you do?”
Samuel: “I have no idea”.
Counsellor: “ What do you think you may be able to say to the boy to help him feel better?”
Samuel: “I truly have no idea.  Everything coming to mind would merely be a distraction.  I truly do not know what I need to say to help this boy feel better”.

Samuel was a grown man feeling quite sad and disappointed in himself for struggling with what he considered should be a relatively easy question for any adult to answer.  Even after several days and much consideration, Samuel still had little idea of what to actually say to the little boy. This continued to frustrate Samuel for some time.

Meanwhile, Samuel came across a discussion about the Hara and immediately developed an interest.  Our Hara is the lower Dantien, sometimes referred to as our second brain and recognised as the source of our gut instincts.  It is the point where our deepest thoughts and feelings merge. Where truth and eternal knowledge can be found. The Hara had become quite a significant discovery for Samuel and he simply had to know more about it.  One peaceful night, Samuel began meditating using a technique he had learnt to assist in cultivating his Hara. On this night, he went to bed feeling quite relaxed and comfortable.

During the early hours of the following morning, Samuel experienced quite an amazing and vivid dream.  He was sitting on the toilet trying to do his business when out of nowhere, a friend walks in like nothing was happening.  Samuel reminded his friend of where he was and demanded some privacy but she flat out refused to leave and continued cleaning around him.  Then other people known to Samuel starting walking in to the bathroom clearly intent on making him annoyed. Samuel continued sitting on the toilet getting increasingly agitated.  He expressed his frustration to everyone but continued to get ignored. After picking himself up off the toilet, he stomped on out of the bathroom. Samuel went outside to find his car and proceeded to leave after deciding he was better off driving out far away to the bush somewhere to be alone.  But his family and friends continued to annoy him making it increasingly difficult to leave. They kept blocking each of the exits either with their cars or by physically standing in his way as if to deliberately annoy him. For Samuel, this seemed to go on forever. Then out of nowhere appeared this exceptionally long and magnificent Cadillac style convertible.  It was white and green with white leather seats and it must have been at least 20 metres long. Samuel was initially mesmerised by the car. It had taken him a moment to realise this car was simply another distraction blocking all exits. His attention then turned back to finding a way out but everyone continued to agitate him and block his way.

This is when Samuel woke from his dream.  Still quite frustrated at everyone in his dream as well as his partner who was laying innocently beside him in their bed, Samuel stormed out of bed and rushed to the adjoining ensuite.  Samuel was brushing his teeth when it suddenly dawned on him that this dream was actually about him. Samuel came to realise that he must have been the little boy the counsellor was initially asking to help.  Suddenly he began weeping uncontrollably making every effort to be as quiet as possible so he wouldn’t bring any attention to himself. The whole time, Samuel kept telling himself he either needed to take off for the bush or find help.  The weeping felt like it was never going to stop. Samuel’s preference was to go bush but he knew running away from his work commitments that day was not going to be easy. Nor did he want to burden others with a problem he couldn’t even understand himself.  

Feeling lost about what to do or where to go, the uncontrollable weeping continued.  But as moments passed, Samuel began having flashbacks of his childhood. Suddenly he started to remember how he often used to run and hide when he felt he was been picked on or agitated by others.  This is what he was doing in his dream. Sometimes Samuel would hide inside the house either in a cupboard or under a bed but more often, Samuel would run outside far from the house to hide in whatever shrubbery he could find.  This was a regular occurrence throughout his childhood. Especially at family gatherings. Samuel would often enjoy listening to his family or friends looking for him as a form of payback. Samuel was still in the bathroom crying uncontrollably at this point and this continued for some time.  It still felt like the crying was never going to end. Samuel continued telling himself that he either needed to go bush or seek help. Eventually Samuel was able to bring himself together long enough to leave the bathroom. Hoping nobody in his family would notice, he cleaned himself up and proceeded to slip through the house and leave without gaining any sort of attention.

It took much of that day for Samuel to recover.  But eventually, he found some words of encouragement to help him get through it.  Samuel came to realise the important thing was that he didn’t run to the bush nor did he have to run to others to fix his problem.  Samuel came to realise that everything he needed was already within him.​

#LostBoy #FindingMyself #MeTime #SelfDiscovery